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RedStar
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
4843 Posts
Gratitude: 657
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 Posted - 02/11/2008 : 14:24:06
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I'm completely out at work as a lesbian. I am the poster girl for gays.
But I have only shared that I have bipolar disorder with three people at work.
So it got me to thinking - is coming out as having a mental illness "worse" than coming out as gay? If so, what are the differences?
Please share your thoughts on this...
God gave us memories that we might have roses in December. - John M. Barrie |
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| Zep
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
2298 Posts
Gratitude: 536
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Posted - 02/11/2008 : 14:41:26
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Coming out as bipolar has both similarities and differences to coming out as gay (I've done both). Coming out as being gay alienates a certain proportion of the population; coming out as being bipolar alienates a slightly different portion of the population!! lol
Seriously, the main difference for me has been the reduction in credibility as having a mental illness - something which doesn't happen with being gay. Homosexuality is not associated with cognitive impairment. So Uni and work have sometimes been problematic with that, and I end up spending a lot of time and energy insisting upon having my human rights respected and making complaints when they are not.
I could go on endlessly about the pros and cons of coming out with either one...but basically, most of the time, I don't regret my openness.
Zep.
Bipolars are never boring! |
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| Ellie
Super Member (250+ posts)
335 Posts
Gratitude: 77
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Posted - 02/12/2008 : 14:15:22
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Hello my mates,
I do not really think that I can condribute on something important in this conversation, but as I have thought about it a lot, I feel the need of saring my thoughts and feelings. (Sorry for my English).
I have thought a lot about feeling the need of being out about both of them; being gay and living with a mental desease. I think I have being living with them since I was very young, both of them was not my choice and I felt different because of that. (The thing I've wished the most since I had a sence of myself was not feeling differet though I had no idea why I did so). Both of them is part of my life, and I feel that I deserve respect and acceptance being different.
So, I want to be out. I tried it with different persons. Some of them about being gay, some of them about having a mental disorder, some of them about both. I had different responces. I deffinetly think that being out on work about my health issue is not a good idea. They mainly want you to be able to work and having a health issue makes you having more chances to infuence your ability. (though I feel totally healthy now, but I do not blame them on being prejudiced about that.) Being gay is somehow different. I think that most of my colleages would be ok with it, but most of my clients wouldn't. Most of them are not very educated. (I work with children. Would you like your child to be treated by a pervert? I wouldn't.) So, I choose to hide it from my celleages and boss.
Being gay is getting more and more accepted in my hightly traditional country. Having a mental health issue isn't.
I also feel that making dessitions based on my sexual prefference is my choice though my sexual prefference isn't. Choosing to be with a woman IS my choice. I could get married. but I don't. On the other hand not being fanctional couse of my illness was not my choice. I couldn't help it. It is strange but I think that this has make me feeling more guilty about that (someone would think that it should be the other way) Anyway I think that a factor that preventing my of being out may be shame as well.
Finally, being out about my health issue is not that urgent. Though it has infuenced my life, my choices and my chances, in the past, it's not infuences it right now. IT may infuences it in future, nobady knows, but I try to live on my present, not on my past or spend my energy worring about the future. What would be the point of talking about it? Complaining about my bad luck? Making the others pity me? But I would like not to hide it, and many times I do so, being afraid about a possible regection because of it.
too talkative, I know. |
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| RedStar
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
4843 Posts
Gratitude: 657
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Posted - 02/13/2008 : 04:30:29
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Not too talkative at all, Ellie. I want thoughtful responses. I am so very out as gay and so very closeted as having a mental health issue that I wanted to toss the issue out there.
Thanks Zep and Ellie - you've shared your perspectives, exactly what I was looking for! I just hope that others will post, as well.
God gave us memories that we might have roses in December. - John M. Barrie |
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| coconutvaper
Starting Member
18 Posts
Gratitude: 11
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Posted - 05/17/2010 : 18:21:47
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Great topic! I consider myself to be very good at coming out. I came out as bi, I came out as lesbian, then I came out as trans.
I've never come out as having a mental issue. However, my main issue is dependent personality disorder.
No one was surprised when I said I was bi.
No one was surprised when I said I was lesbian.
No one was surprised when I said I was trans.
I wonder if anyone would be surprised if I said I am overly dependent. I sort of doubt it. Geez, my issues have always been so obvious! |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
|
| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
|
| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
|
| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
|
| warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)
112498 Posts |
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Topic |
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Out and OUT
