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Depression and Lack Of Self-Confidence

Do You Have Problems With Lack Of Self-Confidence?

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Administrator
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Posted - 09/23/2007 : 21:36:30

Dear Members,

Research has shown that lack of self-confidence is often a problem in depression.

Lack of Self-Confidence is defined as:

Lacks self-confidence; feels inadequate; doesnt act decisively.

Could you please tell our community if lack of self-confidence was part of your depression, and what made this better or worse.

Your comments will greatly help others facing these same problems.

Phil Long M.D.
Administrator

Niney
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Posted - 09/28/2007 : 15:32:25

When I was in a deep depression, self-confidence was definitely a problem. I felt useless, stupid and couldn't stand up for myself. I had a pdoc that was terribly rude and I very rarely defended myself. I think the fact that I wasn't working was a big factor. Also that I had to spend time in a psych ward and lost my house. I just lost my status in society.
It is better now. Many factors helped it to get better. Medication that helped was the first thing. This allowed me to stay out of hospital for almost 2 years. I also felt well enough to change pdocs and to start reentering society again. Courses in cogniteve behavioural therapy helped me identify my thoughts that were not serving me well and helped me to start reframing those thoughts. I started volunteering which made me feel productive and like I was contributing to society. I still have my days when it bothers me that I'm not working for a wage and feel inferior because of my illness, but I am doing much better than before.
Niney

"Hope sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible."
Helen Keller

EmergingArtist
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Posted - 10/03/2007 : 14:39:59

Hi,
It's typical for me to feel not good enough about something every day; I don't think it has that much to do with depression. On second thought, yes, when I feel depression, I think I feel more inadequate than I usually do.

-EA

unemployed
thirty-two-year-old Korean-American
married woman
diagnosed bipolar 1993

Venissa
Starting Member

8 Posts
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Posted - 10/21/2007 : 10:12:05

I never had self-confidence, and I have always been depressed as long as I can recall. I tend to feel like people don't like me because they don't call enough, and I hardly go to friends homes unless invited, only on occasion will I if I need to talk, so I ahrdly interact with people. I don't stand up for myself, and when it comes to what I know I need to do I either hesitate or back out of what I need to. I kept going back to my ex-husband before my attorney finished it for me, because I wouldn't push the last paper. Now my friend, Spike thinks that I will back out of getting a divorce with my current husband. My dad wants me to try to work it out with him along with his family if for nothing else for the baby. I rather get the divorce, but I don't know if I can do it by myself without my dad on my side.

This world is worse than hell and heaven is but a dream out of reach.

FLMgirl
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Posted - 02/27/2009 : 20:38:50

I can trace my history of depression back to about age 11. I have had trouble making decisions and trouble with self-confidence my whole life. It realy frustrates my sister who is 8 yrs older, and is very decisive, out-going and has great self-confidence, and self-esteem.

Once, when I was working through a workbook about depression, I came to the realization that I was not encouraged (as a child) to make decisions. I can remember my mother saying to me, "Want to go to the store with me?" and if I said no, she would say, in a small, sad voice, "Oh, okay. I was hoping you would want to come keep me company..." And, being the people pleaser, next thing I knew, I was going to the store.

I felt inadequate then to make decisions, since I obviously made the wrong or unpopular decision, and now I am still unable, and inadequate to make a appropriate decision.

What has helped somewhat, is to write it out on a piece of paper, the pro's and con's of doing one thing or another, and the possible consequences of doing either one. It is a shame that it takes me all this work just to make a decision, even a simple decision.

Everyday is a winding road...

pauletics
Starting Member

4 Posts

Posted - 04/29/2010 : 12:17:29

Lack of self-confidence is one of the more crippling aspects of depression as it relates to getting out of bed and getting to work. It's hard to feel value when one questions every decision so thoroughly. I work as a psychotherapist with a large school district, so it's necessary to have a little spring in my step. Trudging through the day, feeling sub-par is a real grind.

kristagger
Starting Member

7 Posts
Gratitude: 1

Posted - 03/29/2013 : 09:32:02

Since child hood I have never had allot of self confidence. I was and still to this day my own worst enemy. Speaking up for myself seems to be a impossibility . I am now 43 yrs old a Mom of 3 , 2 grown daughter's and one at home. I still feel as I have always..not good enough. Not good enough to stand up for myself.Even going to mental Health to talk to someone about my feelings..I feel I am not worth it. I am not important enough to bother with. So yes..it gets in the way in my life to accomplishing anything...like going back to work. It terrifies me.

Kristagger

Elendur
Starting Member

4 Posts
Gratitude: 1

Posted - 04/29/2013 : 06:42:07

There must have been a time in my life when I had self-confidence, but if there was, I don't remember it now. I was an honor student in high school, but all I remember is the teachers telling us how hard college was going to be. So I never even considered going to college! The school counselor wasn't any help either. I finally joined the Air Force, thinking I would learn a vocational skill at least. Nine months of "technical training" and I still didn't have any confidence in myself. I got out as soon as I could and couldn't find a job, because every job asks if you have experience! I sought help at a mental health clinic, but the therapists just couldn't seem to grasp the concept of not having self-confidence. They prescribed pills as if that was going to fix me. I finally went to a technical college, but it was the same story. It didn't matter that I had a 4.0 grade point average, I just didn't feel like I knew anything!

warblaster
Super Incredible Member (10000+ posts)