I'm scared to fall asleep. I might dream, but I hope I do not. As the days pile up with out sleep I start to see them. My dreams come to life, I know not waht is real and what is dream. I must sleep, but I do not want to see them again. I remember all the nightmares. I see the faces, I see what was done. I will never be free of it. This nightmares are my punishment for what I have seen. This nightmares are my punishment for what has been done to me. I only hope that I wake soon I hope to forget what it was that made me scream. I know I will never forget the dreams anymore!
As you read I have many problems with sleep and nightmares. Over the years I have seen death close up. I have seen things that I hope no one will every see, but I know others have seen the same thing as I have. There is time that I want it to all end, the screaming out, the night sweets, the scared to sleep. I have dealt with them for a long time, it seems like every time I think it is all over and that I have dealt with it and I sleep a few good nights and then it starts again. If I dream it will be a nightmare, the only thing I can hope for is that I do not dream that night. I know that it is not good for me, but 2 hours here and there is better then waking up and being there again. To think I'm awake and still be asleep and in that nightmare. I know I will never be free of them but maybe one day I will not have them as much, or they will not bother me as much
waking up
Posted - 07/26/2007 : 10:24:48
